Though You Slay Me

One of my favorite songs...  A friend sent this to me when William was in the hospital over a year ago  and on life support.  It's been really hard for me to hear this song in the last few months because it reminds me of a time when I felt so strong and free.  I listened to this song over and over at that time and each time I felt so sure.  Sure that God would see us through whatever He brought to us.  Sure that I could and would love and serve Him through any pain.  Sure that William was safe in His hands.

I am just starting to feel peace with this song again.  My questions are left unanswered, but the peace is slowly beginning to return.  I miss my little boy so much.  It's still hard to breathe at times.  But I am beginning to see and feel the Lord's comfort again.  It does not remove the pain, but it gives me strength to press through it.

In the last months I have not been a "Hall of Faith" Christian.  I have struggled with God.  I have wrestled with truth and deception, assurance and doubt.  All the "what if" questions?  I've had them.  In the end, there is a decision to make.  Believe there's nothing or believe there's everything.  I have to believe the latter.  I can only believe that God is who He says He is and every word in the Bible is true.  And if that's the case, what else is there but to love and serve Him?

Lyrics:

• Lyrics

I come, God, I come
I return to the Lord
The one who's broken
The one who's torn me apart
You struck down to bind me up
You say You do it all in love
That I might know You in Your suffering

Though You slay me
Yet I will praise You
Though You take from me
I will bless Your name
Though You ruin me
Still I will worship
Sing a song to the one who's all I need

My heart and flesh may fail
The earth below give way
But with my eyes, with my eyes I'll see the Lord
Lifted high on that day
Behold, the Lamb that was slain
And I'll know every tear was worth it all

Though You slay me
Yet I will praise You
Though You take from me
I will bless Your name
Though You ruin me
Still I will worship
Sing a song to the one who's all I need

Though tonight I'm crying out
Let this cup pass from me now
You're still all that I need
You're enough for me
You're enough for me

Though You slay me
Yet I will praise You
Though You take from me
I will bless Your name
Though You ruin me
Still I will worship
Sing a song to the one who's all I need
Sing a song to the one who's all I need