Monday, April 18, 2016

6 Months

It has not gotten easier. The tears still come everyday. My arms still ache to hold him. It is still just as unbelievable that life just continues on, unfazed by such a great loss.

I have been surprised by my grief. So much about it truly caught me off guard. I always thought of myself as a "strong" Christian and I believed I would come to terms with my grief quickly. Boy, was I wrong. I am the weakest of the weak. It is nothing but the pure grace of God and prayers of the saints that keeps me from turning back, losing my way, or giving up entirely. I've found that I have no strength, no skill to fight this looming dragon. But the One who fights for me is faithful. Though I am weak, He is strong.

I miss William with everything in me. Time has not eased the pain of loss. But maybe I am growing stronger to bear it.