"Cause me to hear Your lovingkindness in the morning, for in You do I trust;
Cause me to know the way in which I should walk, for I lift up my soul to You."
Psalm 143:8
It’s hard, isn’t it? To obey God when things don’t go the way they should. To not lash out in anger when we’re treated wrongly. To respond with kindness when we’re not treated with kindness. But that’s what we’re called to do.
Obey.
In all things.
When we’re hurting.
When those we have a right to expect love and loyalty from don’t give it.
When our hearts are broken and people disappoint us.
When we’ve been lied to and deceived and manipulated.
How we respond is important. It’s easy to say that we should get away but that’s not always the answer or the thing God wants us to do. He has things to teach us in the trials and it is often through our discomfort that we learn the most.
We don’t have to be our own defenders.
We don’t have to let every hurt be known.
They don’t have to be repentant for us to forgive.
Our one job is to obey God. Let Him take care of the rest.
The Blaze's Tribute Equine Rescue Trainer's Challenge was this past weekend. We've had someone competing every year since 2017. Every year I think, "Not again." It's so rigorous and demanding and I don't see my girls hardly at all for 4 months. 😜
This year Elly and Selah both competed. They both did such a great job! While the last 4 months have added greatly to my stress level 😂😂😂, I know it's been a time of sanctification for all of us. I am so proud of them both on so many levels. Work ethic, perseverance, sportsmanship, character. It's been a rough year with a lot of obstacles but they stuck with it.
Elly picked July. July was scared of her own shadow when she came in. Literally EVERYTHING spooked her. No one could get close to her and she was a kicker. But Elly was patient with her and got her through it. Now she loves attention from people.
They had several set backs in training from injuries (both July AND Elly😁) to, SURPRISE, an unknown pregnancy that ended with a baby being born 7 weeks ago and we welcomed August!
That's a real bummer to training, as you have to give time off then the work was completely different after for awhile. Her options were to take the horse back and get another, drop out, or change her plan and routine and finish the last 7 weeks out knowing she had a huge disadvantage. She finished out. And they did great! Elly felt really good about her freestyle. Even the wind didn't dampen her spirits. 😂
The hardest part of the whole thing for Elly was giving them up. I expected the tears to flow at some point but I thought it might be after we got home, away from everything. But she stood in that stall with them after they got adopted and held onto them and cried her heart out. It broke mine. One of life's hardest lessons is having to let go.
Elly placed 4th in the freestyle. You can watch it here:
Speaking of spooky horses, Selah picked Skeeter. Oh. My. SKEETER. There's a reason that's his name. This horse bounced back and forth. He'd do well for awhile then he lose his mind. Both Abby and Sherrod recommended that she send him back. So did another professional we consulted with. But at the time she considered it, she didn't think there were other horses to choose from and she didn't want to drop out altogether. Plus, it was hard on her to consider just giving up on him just so she could get a better score. So she kept him. She continued to work with him and she got him pretty consistent in hand. At least he has ground manners now! 😜
Selah was able to ride him but he was never consistent in his behavior so she made the tough decision to not ride him for competition. She knew going in what that would do to her scores.
I'm so proud of her for not giving up and not dropping out when she knew she wouldn't have a shot at scoring well. I'm proud of her for making it about more than winning. Both of them.
One important thing that Selah learned about herself through this is that she has a love for photography. 😍 And she has a really good eye!
I think this picture is so neat! I love how she captured herself in his eye!
You can watch Selah's freestyle here:
I would be lying if I said I'm not incredibly relieved that it's over. But I am thankful that they were able to do it. I can see how the experience was good for both of them and how they grew from it. Me, too, actually! 😜
P.S. This is my Thursday post, early. I won't post again until NEXT Thursday, May 27.
Enjoyed having most of my children home at one time this week. It really did my heart good to listen to the laughter with the table full again.
I've never been a big fan of Mother's Day. Poor Michael never knows whether he should or he shouldn't because I just can't decide how I feel about it. I'd much rather have a consistent, loving friendship with my children that to have one day set aside to try to force something. I'd rather share in their joys and sorrows on a daily basis and have the freedom of real conversation, the good and the bad, than to compel everyone to play nice for one day. I'd rather we all show each other daily grace and forgiveness and overlooking of shortcomings than to have a compulsory day where everyone strains to play nice then breathes a big sigh of relief when it's over. That said, this year he rallied the children and went a bit overboard. I think he was concerned at how heavy my heart has been lately that I would feel overlooked. I love that man. He is absolutely the most considerate person I've ever known. He always puts me first, no matter the personal cost to him. I can't say that I've always appreciated it the way I do now.
A friend of mine posted the following on Mother's Day. I've known a lot of mothers who have plenty of sorrow on that day, myself included. Life is hard. It's hard to parent young children. It's hard to parent adult children. And everything in between. But it's a beautiful calling that sanctifies us and draws us ever closer to Him, remembering how much we are loved.
"You ARE loved" - by Michelle Leonard
Don’t let a day define your worth
My heart broke yesterday as I read the posts of some of my friends.
Years ago an older woman told me that she thought Mother’s Day was added for the “commercialism” and to break the hearts of mothers. She was speaking from her painful experiences and years of heartache.
I know that Mother’s Day isn’t always a happy day.
Some moms are celebrated. Some feel forgotten.
Some are showered with gifts, some aren’t.
(Some would just love to have a shower! )
Some moms are stressed
Some are broken
Some are happy
Some are lonely
Some are sad
Some have dreams
Some have things they can’t overcome
Some have children who are thriving, and their Momma hearts are so thankful.
Some have children who are struggling - and their Momma hearts break.
Some have good relationships with their children, some long for what could be, maybe what was.
Some arms ache from holding children, while some arms ache for the children they’ve never held.
Some moms long for their children to come home.
Some moms long for their children who’ve gone to their Heavenly home.
For some it is a painful reminder.
No matter where you are - as a woman, as a Momma, Jesus loves you. He is there.
We said good-bye to an old friend this week. Ida has been a faithful friend for a good portion of the children's lives.
She is very likely the best LGD we've ever had. She's always been good with animals, but she made the children her "job" many years ago. Wherever they went, she went. She was always in the midst of them. I remember once when Michael let the boys camp outside and I was worried so after they went to sleep I went outside to sleep on a cot outside the tent. Ida was parked right outside the tent door and not budging. Once I got there, she would walk around the tent and look around then come back to stand guard. She continued to make her rounds all night. When I went back inside, she parked right at the door again until they were up. I always knew I could relax when Ida was around. And she was always up for an adventure with the children.
Sarah used to take her down to the office when she had to be there alone. Ida would sleep with one eye open and Sarah would relax. Everyone felt safe with Ida on guard.
She had such a personality and I felt that we could almost tell what she was thinking by her different facial expressions. She knew when to be concerned and when to chill. Although, even when we let someone in the fence and she knew it was okay, she would give this grumpy look and a warning bark without getting up, reminding me of a mother's, "Don't make me get up and come over there." 😆
She's always been good with other animals and been invaluable at teaching other dogs how to behave around children and livestock.
She was so funny about the house. She hated coming in. I could not coax her in during the winter time. She loved the cold weather. However, if it got hot enough, I could get her to come in to the tile for a short amount of time. But she always acted like she hated it.
I am so thankful for this sweet friend who has been an unwavering companion. She is already missed.
What began as updates of William's daily life as seen through the eyes of his mother: about deafness and learning to hear with cochlear implants, blindness, breathing issues, mobility, and more...became one family learning to walk through their deepest sorrow when William flew home to heaven on October 18, 2015.
