6 mo Update

I told Sarah that I wanted to post the update this week. She's been so faithful and has done a great job of keeping everyone in the loop. I'm grateful. But it's been a wild week and with hitting the 6 month mark, I just thought it was time. Even though I don't use the blog anymore, I chose to put it here because of those not on FB that I can just send the link to. It's just easier. And it's likely to get lengthy. :) It is hard to believe that just 6 months ago we were just going about everyday life. That just 6 months ago today we were enjoying a family dinner, completely clueless of how our world was about to change. It's crazy how something like this can hit completely out of the blue. Which is just a reminder that, no matter how much we think we are or how much we wish to be, we are not as in control as we would like.

There really isn't much to update in the way of the glioblastoma. Selah traveled with us to Duke this time. It was sweet to have her there. We would like to take all the children with us but it just hasn't worked out. But she enjoyed going and sitting in on the doctor's appointment. They are still working to get the swelling down. He will repeat the MRI in a couple of weeks so we can see how treatments are working.

We also had a big decision to make regarding travel. Last year, Selah won an all-inclusive trip for 2 to the Bahamas that she added a 3rd onto so that the three of us could go together. All we had to do was get to West Palm Beach. We really deliberated about going. It's so hard to make these decisions in the midst of all this turmoil. It's interesting how the timing worked out. When the dates were set, we had no idea that we would be here, now. And we didn't try to schedule Duke around it. But it worked out that instead of flying home from Duke, we just flew to PBI and took the trip from there. Talk about timing. It was nerve-wracking to plan this one. We can't rely on what Michael wants to do because it changes from day to day. Or even how he feels because that changes by the minute. But we decided that he won't likely have the opportunity to take Selah on her 21st birthday trip (a tradition he's done with the children) so we took this blessing and made the most of it.

He said the highlight of the trip was feeding the sea turtle Nutter Butters while we were swimming with pigs. :)

I'm so glad he had a good time! Not that it was all sunshine and roses. There were definitely some trials but we made it through and made some great memories. Travel is becoming harder and harder for him and I'm not even sure how the Duke trips will continue to work out. We will have to see.

We had the opportunity to dress up and that was fun! Of course, when we went out to the beach it rained on us! Haha! It was the only time we got rained on the whole trip. Our hair fell flat but we had a great time!

He still had assignments to do from his occupational therapist and he was able to put this lego car together all by himself. It took him the better part of the day but it was quite the accomplishment. Another big highlight for him, of course, was all the people he got into conversations with. Especially one of our taxi drivers who loves America and they spent the entire 30 minute drive discussing God's goodness and the American political climate. As is always the case, I am so thankful for God's providence and His care over even the littlest details of our lives. Michael needed this trip and the timing of it, though a bit stressful, couldn't have been better. It was a great deterrent to keep his mind off the fact that he was coming home with no job. That's been a very difficult thing for him to get through. His short term disability ends on Monday and he will be officially separated from his company. That's not an easy thing for a man who has done the same thing for 45 years. It's been his purpose and his identity. Even though he understands his greater purpose, to glorify God and to enjoy Him forever, it's still been difficult to let go of his work. Many tears have been shed. Even his occupational therapist cried. We had gone to his office to clean out his personal items right before therapy on Friday and his entire session was spent talking about his work and what he could do with his time, as he's so limited in his abilities right now. It amazes me how the pendulum swings back and forth. While we were at his office, a coworker came in and they carried on a 2 minute conversation. Michael's speech was clear and confident and I sat there, amazed, thinking he sounded like nothing had ever happened. It's a gift to get those little glimpses. They don't last long but they are precious. Michael is tired. He hates chemo and it's very hard on him, both physically and mentally. He also wants to start cutting back on therapies. For the past 6 months, we've travelled almost every week day, either to OKC or Tulsa, for some therapy or treatment of some sort. He wants to cut that back to one day a week. This is where it becomes difficult as a caregiver. I covet prayers for wisdom in his care, along with prayers for miraculous healing. Many people want to know how we're doing. The only answer I really know how to give is...we are thankful. God has been so kind to us in so many ways. We are thankful to have such a faithful husband and father. We are thankful to have more time with him. We are thankful to be able to care for him in his need, as he has done for us for so many years. We are thankful for the Lord's provision through a great company and through faithful family and friends. We are thankful that He carries us when it is too hard to press on.